Category Archives: Emotional Intelligence

Treat others the way they want to be treated

Dating, Friendships, Human Nature, Relationships

Treat others the way they treat you 

-> Treat others the way you want to be treated

-> Treat others the way they want to be treated

The first level is eye for an eye. They treat you well, you treat them well. They treat you bad, you treat them bad. There is a vengeance and cruelty to it.

The second level is narcissistic. You train and build yourself up with firm values, and then assert them on others regardless of whether it is right for the other person or not. You don’t acknowledge the beauty there is in the uniqueness of every person. You don’t acknowledge that people are individuals to be treated differently. You treat them all the same based on your own thoughts.

The third level is compassionate and respectful. You listen, empathize, then give according to how they wish to receive. The only way to effectively give love is to understand how the other person receives love. How they receive love in reality is often not the same as what they say in words, because they may lack self awareness or there could be miscommunication. Try different ways of giving love, and watch how they react. Go with what they like and enjoy receiving, not what you like to give.

Overcoming Fear

Achieve Success, Emotional Intelligence, Life Lessons

My New Year’s Resolution for 2023 is to face and overcome my fears. I no longer want to be held back. I want to rise up thrive grow and achieve success. This is how I plan to overcome my fear:

  1. Defining in objective detail what it is I’m afraid of and be as specific as possible.
    1. Example: Do not say a fear of snakes. Say a fear of a snake bite that results in death.
    2. Example: Do not say a fear of abandonment. Say the fear of the pain of grief, loss, and sorrow that comes from abandonment.
  2. Describe why I am afraid of it. What exactly about the situation do I dislike?
    1. For the snake bite, the real fear is my fear of death and of a scar on the skin. If a snake bit me and I didn’t die and it didn’t make a mark, I could handle the pain of the pinch no problem.
    2. For abandonment, the real fear is my fear of loneliness. If someone abandoned me, but I still had many other friends and family to lean on, I could handle the pain of abandonment.
  3. Make Plans around the fear.
    1. Wear thick clothing around snakes or hikes with snakes. Do research ahead of time for where there are snakes.
    2. Join Clubs and maintain an active Social Life. Make and maintain friendships.
  4. Accept your fear might come true someday and that you did your best. Make a plan for when the worst does occur.
    1. If you are bitten, know you have health insurance, you can call 911. Live each day like it could be your last, so you have no regrets if it is your last day.
    2. Build out your emergency contacts list.

Rebuilding Trust – An Amazing Video

Emotional Intelligence, Human Nature, Relationships, Social Skills

I recommend this video on how to regain trust in a relationship. The theme is about lying, but I would extend the usefulness of this video to include less serious situations like situations where expectations are missed. For example, if you say you’ll get eggs from the grocery store and you forget the eggs, a loss of trust can occur because you failed to live up to what you said you’d do. Even in the egg situation, this video will be useful in rebuilding trust with your partner.

Strongly recommend anyone watch this video on how to regain trust in a relationship.