All posts by Solomon

Process Emotional Setbacks in a Healthy Way

Emotional Intelligence, Life Advice, Mental Health

Tony Robbins says: Focus on what you can change, what you have, and what is in the present. 

Don’t focus on what you can’t change, what you don’t have, and on the past or future instead of the present. 

To overcome a setback, interpret the meaning of what happened. Ask what happened and what did it mean. Find the Emotional root of what things mean to you. This will help you understand what is going on with you emotionally. Recognizing and describing your emotions is the first step to healing. The next step is to decide on what the healthy solution is and to do that healthy solution.

Master Your Desires

Human Nature

Sometimes, your desire to have something is rooted in your lack of something. If you have a self identity of lacking something, then the issue is not the ‘not having it’ but the ‘thinking you lack it.’ When you think you lack it as an identity, you should watch yourself to prevent the following harmful behaviors: 1. self sabotage in order to get what you desire 2. the fear of losing it once you get it (which will cause you to never have a moment to enjoy having it, even when you do have it).

This concept reminds me of the idea that if someone says they ‘believe’ something, that means it isn’t a fact. If they knew it was true, they would say it’s fact and not say they believe it’s true.

Similarly, instead of desiring say Happiness, focus on “I currently don’t have happiness” so that later you can say “I currently do have happiness.” If you give too much power to “desiring happiness” then even when you “currently have happiness” you will be stuck in the state of “desiring happiness.”